Start Moving, Stop overeating

I grew up in a house with a large wooded area behind it. When I was small, I would run as fast as I could along the paths trying not to break a single twig or make a sound. I would run swiftly (like a deer, I thought). Sometimes I imagined I was an Indian princess or a brave running to save my village (I never knew from what). The wind would race past my ears. I would feel free and light as I hopped over tiny streams and logs. Moving was a game then. It was about having fun. Do you have a favorite memory of feeling comfortable like that in your body as a child? Many people do, but many do not, especially if they became physically self-conscious early on. For many of us though, moving stopped being fun at some time early in our lives.
I don’t know when I stopped running like a deer, but at some point I did. Maybe I just got too busy with life and the business of paying attention to everyone else. Maybe I got self-conscious as I developed breasts. Maybe I realized that having fun being in my body was for “little kids” and I got too old for that sort of thing. I don’t know. Whatever messages I did receive about my body did not encourage grace and speed unless they referred to competition or exhibition, like dancing class or team sports. What I do know is that the less I moved, the more junk food I ate compulsively. How about you?

Understanding Spirituality

Nurturing our spirit is essential to Taming our Chew. Many of us have a hard time defining spirituality for ourselves. In December of 1995, a conference called Spirituality and Healing was co-sponsored by Harvard Medical School and The Mind/Body Institute of the Deaconess Hospital in Boston, Massachusetts. Spirituality was defined at this assembly as “the belief that we all have meaning and purpose in life and that on a profound level we are all connected.” This may ring true for many of us. However, each of us is unique and thus our perceptions of spirit are as varied as we are. Let me take a moment here to clarify that when I speak of spirituality, I am not referring to religion. Most of us were raised within an organized religion. Many of us chose to stop attending to that religion when we became adults. I am not suggesting a return to religious practice, although for some that may be helpful. I am suggesting that you develop the ability to turn inward and listen to your own voice – that voice which is heard (faintly at first) deep within your core self. To hear this voice, however, you must be still and listen to yourself.

Self love, not emotional eating, is the answer

People who come to see me frequently report a sense of being alone in their struggle. As I have said before, we all have a strong need for connection – to feel loved, accepted, and cared about. Without the presence of these feelings, at least some of the time, life’s battles quickly become overwhelming and the task of treating ourselves with compassion, respect and nurturance seems impossible. It is then that we turn to sugar, salt and fat and try to soothe ourselves through emotional eating. We cannot count on others or on food to give us these good feelings. We must learn to give them to ourselves by finding the love, connection and energy we have deep inside. Our work is to learn to love ourselves.

Dr Denise Returns

Please excuse my long absence. Chew Tamer’s blog was moved but now I’m back and I hope all of you faithful readers will return. Starting next week I will once again begin posting information that will help you along on your Chew Tamer’s Journey. I look forward to reconnecting with all of you. I will be addressing emotional eating issues from physical, emotional, social, spiritual and environmental perspectives. Please e-mail your concerns and questions to me at denise@deniselamothe.com. I will answer in my weekly bloggings as swiftly as I can and please visit my new website www.drdenise.org. There is much info for you there as well...
My warmest wishes, Dr. Denise

Blog move

As of now, my Chew Tamer's blog will continue at a new address: www.drdenise.org . Please join me there for future posts. Thank you, Dr. Denise

Benefits of being overweight

When I suggest there may be something you are getting out of your extra pounds, you may think my idea is absurd! But, as a Clinical Psychologist, Weight Loss Analyst and someone who has struggled with and survived the entire spectrum of eating disorders with over 25 years of personal and professional experience, I know this to be true.

Being overweight is not simple and generally there are at least a few hidden, unconscious agendas behind the eating behavior. Close your eyes, take a few deep breaths and think for a few minutes about the advantages you get from being overweight. Then return to the present. Write those advantages down. Perhaps your weight provides the illusion of safety. For example it can keep you from taking the risk to be in a romantic relationhip or it gives you an excuse to stay home and hide.

Now note any other, more nurturing ways you can take care of yourself and your feelings and write these down. Next, choose one area where you would like to make a change. For example, if you have discovered that one advantage of overeating has been to numb feelings of grief, you might plan to talk with a friend about your loss. In this way, you allow your feelings to surface and find expression and you no longer need food to anesthetize yourself. You can do this exercise often as a way of checking in with yourself and changing your compulsive behavior.

It works!

My best,
Dr. Denise

Inspiration from Dr. Denise Lamothe

A few days ago I received an e-mail from a young man who had been struggling with eating problems throughout his life. His had yo-yo dieted for many years before his weight skyrocketed to 495 pounds. He was dianosed with a debilitating, frightening heart condition and this was indeed his wake-up call. He consented to lap band surgery and began educating himself about his self-destructive eating -- looking at the physical, emotional, spocial and spiritual aspects of this frustrating issue. He was kind enough to write and tell me that reading The Taming of the Chew gave him the hope he so desperately needed to begin walking down his own path to a healthier life. He is working now on loving himself, staying in the present, giving up perfectionistic self expectations and being gentle with himself. He is embracing his challenge and he has inspired me! That's why I am sharing him with you!

Enjoy Spring!