Tuesday, April 21, 2009

What do you love to do?

What do you love to do? What are you passionate about? When was the last time you became totally immersed in an activity? Many of us spend our days simply, mindlessly making it through to the next day and then to the day after that. Then we ask ourselves if this is what life is supposed to be like. Is this really all there is to it? Is the hokey pokey really what it’s all about? If that is so then anesthetizing ourselves with sugars and carbohydrates certainly makes sense.

We create our lives. You have most likely heard this many times in the past but perhaps you lost that thought amid the bombardment of every day concerns. What would it mean to you to create your life? When would you begin and how would you proceed? When was the last time you sat in stillness to think about this? Have you ever taken the quiet, reflective time necessary to come to truly know yourself?

If we don’t spend the time and effort to go within, we end up living as robots performing the tasks that we imagine we are supposed to perform. Life can feel empty and meaningless and we soothe our discontented, unfulfilled feelings with substances – food, drugs, alcohol, etc. Perhaps there are more efficient and meaningful ways to conduct our lives.

We have a blueprint of ways to begin. Eat well. Choose live foods that fill our bodies with nourishment. Give our bodies the tender loving care they deserve. Give them lots of pure water, a moderate amount of sunshine, ample rest, exercise and lots of things to smile about. Give your body attention. Get a massage, stretch, breathe, and giggle. Begin to relax and stop taking everything so personally and so seriously.

You are well worth any effort you put into your self-care. As a professional speaker I am often asked what the best ways are to acheive health, happiness and balance. The paragraph above has many suggestions and the best approach is to be gentle with yourself. As I have said again and again, never beat yourself up. Self-punishment will only make everything worse. Instead focus upon what you have done and what you want. positive thoughts will attract more positive thoughts. The time for you to love you is NOW!!!

Monday, April 13, 2009


Random House defines courage as:

1. the quality of mind or spirit that enables a person to face difficulty, danger, pain, etc., with firmness and without fear. Bravery

2. to act in accordance with one’s belief, especially in spite of criticism.

The first definition of courage may conjure up images such as knights slaying dragons, pioneers persevering through the hardest of times or someone defusing a bomb in today’s world. These are examples of bravery that we have heard about. We all know stories of people who have performed feats of bravery. This is the type of courage I needed to begin racing motorcycles. I would argue, however, that often the act was performed despite the fear, not without it.

The second definition is the one I have been addressing in this book. It is the courage associated with acting on your convictions, despite others’ opinions or feelings about your behavior. What I talk about is following your heart and making your choices. This is the form of courage that is required. After all, others may not be as interested in your happiness as you are. They have their own lives to manage and sometimes a change in your behavior can be perceived as a threat to their world.

If others are used to having you at home every night and you decide to go out once or twice a week to visit friends or attend a yoga class, for example, they may take it personally and think you don’t want to be with them. Or they may resent the fact that you are not there to handle all the things you were doing in the evening. Sometimes they can’t identify a concrete reason but they may feel out of control because you have begun making decisions about your life which they may not understand.

Women are primarily relational beings. We don’t like it when those around us become upset. Because our self esteem depends upon our ability not only to make, but also to maintain, growthful, reciprocal connections we may feel threatened when someone near to us expresses their anger or fear about our choices.

This is a conundrum for women. We want to follow our hearts and do that which pleases us but, at the same time, we don’t want to make waves. We do not want to cause ripples in the smooth outer surface of our relationships. To avoid the conflict that we imagine will ensue, we cave in and put our needs either on hold or throw them out entirely.

If we do stick to our guns and follow our intuition, making self-loving choices and molding our lives as we want them to be, we may then compensate for having the audacity to put ourselves first by “over-caring” others. If we feel guilty because we are doing something we really want to do, one way to appease others and assuage our guilt is to put the others’ needs in the foreground the remainder of the time. This is unhealthy not only for them, but for us as well.

It is vital to learn ways to take care of our own needs without feeling guilty. If we do not, we make ourselves vulnerable and emotional eating will emerge as one way to soothe ourselves. So, be courageous. Take the very best care of yourself. This is your job!

Wednesday, April 8, 2009

Make Your Appetite Your Friend

If you want to befriend your appetite and get it to help instead of hurt you, the basic premise is this:

Your appetite (or Chew) transmits a constant stream of messages to you that frequently are NOT about actual hunger.

If you simply pay attention to the “hunger” messages and attempt to satiate yourself with food, you have missed important communication from your internal guidance system. You are likely to remain hungry and not feel satisfied.

When you “tame” or befriend your appetite and pay close attention to the valuable communication it brings, you begin to value your appetite as a true friend, instead of a foe.

Because your desires extend far beyond controlling both your food intake and your weight, your Chew begins to work beside you to encourage you along the path to radiant health, joy, balance and the creation of the life you truly desire.

To craft your ideal life, you must be clear about what your desires actually are and learn to be positive as much as possible. Then, as The Law of Attraction assures, you will attract positive experiences and feelings.

Your Chew will become friendly, loyal, playful and will stand beside you. It will alert you vigilantly when you are on the right track, moving towards achieving your life goals or when you are not.

It will constantly and faithfully deliver messages from your internal guidance system about what choices are in your best interest in all aspects of your life.